


Don't Let Go, You're All I Need

by 01blackcat02



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-01
Updated: 2018-08-01
Packaged: 2019-06-19 21:31:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15518997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/01blackcat02/pseuds/01blackcat02
Summary: No matter how many walls Arthur put up, nothing could have prepared him for this.





	Don't Let Go, You're All I Need

“You're my boyfriend.”

Arthur felt numb and sick after hearing those words.

If the heavy hands on his shoulder weren't physically holding him in place, the Brit would probably run through the doors and never come back.

* * *

 

Arthur knew fairly early on that he was like this.

In grade sixth, a girl kissed him and Arthur broke down in tears forcing the teachers to call his parents.

The little girl looked mortified at Arthur’s reaction and afterwards spend the rest of the school year making fun of him.

Arthur supposed she just didn't understand why she was rejected so boldly, and teasing was a self-defensive response to keep her pride.

Still, Arthur was transferred to an all-boy private school and had managed to finish there relatively unharmed.

After high school, he looked around him and saw his peers pair off one after another.

“It's just a phase.” The doctor said and his traditional parents nodded in reassurance, but the uncomfortable fear in their eyes told Arthur that if he wanted things to go his way he would have to find a way out from under his parents’ radar.

“I want to study in America.”

The initial inquiry was met with frowns and rejection, but after some more visits to the therapist, Arthur managed to get the shrink on his side.

“It might be a good idea to get him out into a new environment. Growing up in a small town can be...uninspiring. Maybe the ladies across the pond will spark an interest.”

Arthur went to the university of his choice and got into their history program.

If he was going to be stuck in the land of the yanks with a full ride from his father's money he might as well take advantage of the situation.

The monthly phone calls were easy enough to get through. Especially if he mentioned seeing someone every once in awhile. He didn’t repeat any names since a long-term relationship, never mind that is was fictional, would prompt a visit from his parents. But the knowledge that Arthur was dating kept them at bay and Arthur finished his undergrad in peace.

“Hey, wanna catch a movie sometime?”

Arthur sighed looking up from his book. “I have a book report due. Sorry.”

He looked down not wanting to see the hurt in the young man’s eyes.

The American walked away and all Arthur felt was relief.

* * *

 

“Hey, Artie…”

Arthur tensed as a hand stroked his side and Alfred pressed a sloppy kiss to his neck.

“You okay honey?”

The hand was running over his exposed skin and Arthur felt sick at the memories. Then the hand dipped lower to his ass and the Brit jumped out of bed.

Pain shot down his spine making him hiss.

“Careful!” Alfred was halfway out of the bed but Arthur stopped him.

“I'm fine. Just need a shower.” He bit out and retreated to the bathroom.

It wasn't fair. Arthur knew that. But he didn't care. Instead, he kneeled in the shower while the water was running over his sore body, his sobbing bouncing off the walls.

By the time Arthur emerged from the bathroom, eyes red, Alfred was making them breakfast.

The comforting smell of fried eggs and bacon did nothing to break the tension.

“Arthur. Talk to me.” Alfred finally said and Arthur had to look away from those hurt blue eyes.

“I have to get to work.” Was all he said before walking away refusing the American a chance to protest.

He grabbed his work bag and ran from his own apartment.

* * *

 

“How is Antonio?” His mom asked and Arthur had to remind himself who Antonio was.

“He’s fine mum,” Arthur replied remembering the man from his Spanish class.

“You think we can have a Skype call together?” She tentatively asked and Arthur’s warning bells were ringing.

After a pause he slowly said. “I don't think it's going to work out.”

He hated watching the hopeful look on her face crumble at the news. He hated watching it, but hated himself more at the feeling of relief that settled in him.

* * *

 

Arthur worked as an editor.

It was a self-satisfying job that kept him mostly occupied with revisions and clients, but over time he befriended a few coworkers here and was content to go out for drinks with them and meet up for the occasional brunch on Sundays.

Those same coworkers met Arthur that morning with knowing smirks and the awkward high fives as if Arthur just successfully managed to publish the next big hit writer instead of getting plastered at their office party last night.

Arthur barricaded himself in his office and didn't emerge till long past five.

* * *

 

“I'm going to stay for a masters,” Arthur said to the pixelated image of his parents.

He saw his father's brows furrow.

“What do you need a master's for?”

That was the last conversation he had with his parents.

* * *

 

Arthur slowly opened his front door and looked around the dark hallway. He held his breath in anticipation but when no immediate turmoil came he relaxed.

Walking through the house Arthur felt the ghost of the incident still linger. He opened all the windows, letting the cold night breeze air out his apartment.

But even after changing the sheets Arthur didn't sleep well without Alfred by his side.

In the morning he took one look at the dark circles under his eyes and knew that running like he had from his parents wouldn't work in this situation.

* * *

 

It was about a year ago when Arthur met Alfred, and his life hasn’t been the same since.

“That's the president's son.”

Arthur heard in passing but didn't linger on that comment. After all, he had an actual job to do than to stand around and gossip with the rest of the office.

By lunchtime to cocky young man had caught a sight of him and proclaimed them boyfriends.

And just like that, Arthur's meticulous planning, lying, and self-preservation were knocked from under his feet and toppled around him.

* * *

 

Alfred was angry.

Arthur could see the irritation and hurt on his partner’s face. Could feel that his knee was bouncing under the table, and Arthur knew that Alfred wanted to lash out.

He supposed it wasn't very often that the American didn't get what he wanted.

Then just as quickly, Alfred’s whole demeanor shifted and Arthur was almost knocked back by the sheer hurt that shined through Alfred’s eyes.

Those blues darted around the kitchen then unexpected teared up.

“You really don't want me, do you?”

Somehow Arthur found himself crouching beside Alfred wiping away the tears shushing him softly.

Later that night when both were wrapped in a tight embrace, and Arthur was idly drawing patterns on Alfred's chest, he began to re-evaluate his life choices and decisions.

This. The cuddling and warmth of his partner by him...was nice. Comforting. Something that Arthur cherished and looked forward to at the end of the day. Although Alfred’s personality was over the top at times and easily excitable, Arthur liked spending time with him. He like their playful banters and the times that he had to patiently explain to Alfred why building a rollercoaster at the top of their skyscraper was a bad idea.

But beside all of that, Arthur genuinely loved Alfred. When Alfred hurt, Arthur hurt in turn and reached out to make it better. He didn’t even have to think, he just did it on instinct. It was as if Alfred integrated himself so fully into Arthur’s life, that now he couldn’t even imagine living without the goofy American.

Perhaps the bantering that defined most of their relationship post ‘declaration’, as Arthur called it, really was flirting and Arthur was too caught up in a pattern to notice the change in his own feelings.

Sex was unexpected in a way that it was simply outside of Arthur’s realm of possibilities that this could even happen in the first place.

They were at a party. One moment he was having a conversation and a few drinks with his coworkers and the next Alfred was pressing him against a wall and they were kissing.

He got too drunk and so did Alfred. It happened all too fast. The descent into madness of the moment was an almost an out of body experience for Arthur. It was his body that leaned into the touch fueled by the alcohol, heat, and warmth of Alfred, but deep inside his mind, the Brit was screaming that this was wrong.

He knew that by the time he was rational this incident would permanently change their relationship.

And Arthur didn't have a plan for such a scenario, because he simply didn't think it would happen at all.

* * *

“That night didn’t count,” Arthur said, slightly proud that his voice didn't shake despite the anxiety that spread through him.

He watched Alfred's baffled expression, as he put down his coffee. 

“What?” Then he grew a little angry. “But that was-”

“But that's it.” Arthur cut him off. “It was just a drunken mistake!”

Alfred's jaw locked. “So what? You don't find me attractive or something.” He was trying to lighten the mood and failing.

Arthur supposed having your first sexual encounter dismissed as a ‘drunken mistake’ hurt, but Arthur didn't have a frame of reference to know for sure.

“I thought you loved me?” Alfred finally said as panic flashed on his face. 

“I do. Very much, actually.” Arthur allowed a small smile at Alfred's relief.

After all, that wasn't a lie. When Alfred declared them boyfriends, Arthur was kicking and screaming against this. At first. But then the president's son, soon to be CEO, inserted himself into Arthur's life so deep and so easily that Arthur almost didn't notice the transition from declared enemies to lovers. 

“That was my first time...ever.” Arthur blushed and looked away. He wasn’t ashamed of himself, but he also didn’t want Alfred to laugh at him or worse. 

Alfred groaned and leaned to bang his head on the table. “I know. I'm sorry! I don’t have a high alcohol tolerance and you looked so good and happy.” He looked up at Arthur guilt in his eyes. “I didn’t want it to be like that either. I know how you are about sex. I wanted to wait for when you were ready.”

Arthur’s face grew hotter and he smiled while staring down at his tea cup. “You would wait for me for as long as I need?” He tentatively asked.

Alfred reached out across the table and placed his too warm hand over Arthur’s. 

“Of course I would. I love you.”

Arthur looked up at Alfred’s equally red face. They have been together for almost two years now. Despite the initial rocky start, Arthur had to admit they just worked together. Even when Arthur explicitly stated that he wasn’t interested in having sex, Alfred took in it stride and accepted him. And it’s not like Arthur rejected the idea fully, he just wanted to connect with his partner on a deeper level first.

“You remember that time we went to California?” Arthur asked with a smile and Alfred brightened up at the memory.

“Oh yeah! That was a good trip.”

“I liked that.” Arthur licked his lips self-consciously. “Spending time together. Cuddling on the beach.” 

“The kissing was nice too.” Alfred grinned happily if a little tentatively. 

“Yes. The kissing was nice.” Arthur smile widened as Alfred reached across the table to do just that.

They pulled apart and it was the easy comfort of knowing each other for months that settled between them.

“I didn’t want our first time to be like that,” Arthur admitted.

Alfred looked up with regret in his eyes. “I didn’t either. I even had a perfect plan for when you _would_ be ready to take that step with me. I'm sorry I ruined it Artie.” The American smiled sadly at Arthur. “I was drunk and wasn’t thinking. Please forgive me.”  

 

Arthur stared up at Alfred’s blue eyes and after a moment leaned in across the table and pressed a chaste kiss on the American’s lips.

“You weren't the only one drunk. I allowed you to do it because even while intoxicated I still trust you.”

Arthur took in the adoration shining in his partner’s eyes and considered their options. Before Alfred, his life was fairly simple. Manageable. Then the American came and changed all the rules in Arthur’s life he oh so carefully established.

“Don’t feel like anything has to change,” Alfred lifted their hands so he could kiss Arthur’s knuckles. “I don’t want you to feel pressured to do something you’re not ready for. I want whatever you can give me. I love you first and foremost.”

Arthur’s heart couldn’t handle much more of this before it burst with all this love.

“I love you too, you big oaf.” He grinned at his boyfriend. “Now, are you gonna make breakfast or should I?” He waved Alfred away as he took a few sips of his tea in an effort to calm his beating heart.

Alfred happily grinned as he watched Arthur’s effort to composed himself back into his usual grumpy self.

“No way! You just sit there, sweetheart, and drink your soggy leaf water.” He cheerfully said as he stood up and began pulling the ingredients for their breakfast.

Arthur eyed Alfred's bent ass while the American was rummaging in the fridge pulling out eggs and bacon and rolled his eyes at the comment. Then he looked away with a content smile and took a sip of his black tea.  
  
Their kitchen was once again filled with playful bickering and the sound of cooking. Arthur eventually stood up to help set the plates and poured Alfred his second cup of coffee.   
  
When Arthur was younger, he never dreamed that there would be anyone for him. Instead, he navigated the complex world of social norms with precise planning and avoidance.

Then Alfred came and shattered his little world, the walls that Arthur put around him collapsed one by one.

Now, his lonely little apartment, just like his heart, was bursting with joy and happiness. It wasn't easy, but Arthur knew that despite all the inconveniences and misunderstandings, the love he felt for Alfred was worth it.

* * *

 

~Extra~

“It’s going to be okay, sweetheart.” Alfred’s warm hand squeezed his in reassurance.

“Easy for you to say,” Arthur looked out of the window at the neighbourhood he grew up in pass them by. “You had a great relationship with your parents.”

“Well...sure, but it’s not like they disowned you or something. You just-”

“Haven’t spoken to them in over five years.” Arthur said with a blank tone.

“Everything will be okay, you’ll see.” Alfred simply repeated what he’s been saying since he booked their flight three weeks ago.

A small part of Arthur was furious that Alfred would do this, but another larger part was hopeful. It was difficult living in a foreign country by himself even if he had been here since undergrad. He wanted to call his parents, but the time and distance he put between them grew more and more with each passing day. If it wasn’t for Alfred, Arthur’s pride probably would have never allowed himself to reach out to them.

Alfred’s fingers where gently rubbing over his and Arthur looked down at the wedding band.

“You think they’ll be happy for us?” Arthur quietly asked.

“I’m sure they will be!” Was Alfred’s obvious reply.

The taxi suddenly stopped and Arthur found himself outside staring out at the house he grew up in.

Nothing has changed much. Still the same red front door and a beautiful garden at the front of the house.

“So, you want to ring or...should I?” Alfred asked.

“What if they moved?” Arthur asked.

“Well...I didn’t check for sure, but the house records say it’s still in the Kirkland name-”

“Arthur?!”

Arthur jolted not noticing the front door opened and his mother standing on the steps.

Swallowing his nerves Arthur walked briskly to her, stopping just before the steps and hesitantly waved.

“Hi mum.”

She aged just a bit since the last he saw her. There were definitely more gray in her blonde hair but overall she aged gracefully.

As if snapping out of a daze she instantly teared up and ran to Arthur bringing him into a hug.

“Oh Arthur! I can’t believe this! I missed you so much!

“I missed you too, mum.” Arthur said slightly perplexed, but wrapped his arms around her after a moment. His feelings were all over the place and before he knew it he was sobbing along with his mother.

“Arthur?”

He opened his wet eyes and saw his aging father coming towards them with open arms which soon were wrapped around them both.

They pulled apart, after several minutes of just hugging each other, wiping their tears away while laughing.

“I’m sorry, that I…” Arthur hiccuped and turned to reach out for Alfred.”This is...this is Alfred. We’re going to get married.”

“Hi ya!” Alfred self-consciously grinned and extended his hand, to which he was immediately pulled into a hug by both of Arthur’s parents.

“We’re so happy to meet you. Come in, come in. I’ll put the kettle on. Do you drink tea, Alfred?” Arthur’s mother was still wiping away her tears as she questioned Alfred with a frenzy of excitement.

They were quickly ushered inside, the old house suddenly coming alive with energy Arthur hadn’t felt for years.

Seated at a dining table, Arthur felt world away trying to process that he was really back and that Alfred was seated right there beside him while his mother pulled out the good china and his father searching the bookshelf for his baby pictures which Alfred immediately asked to see.

“Hey, sweetheart, you ok?”

Alfred asked him with a smile as his hand squeezed Arthur’s on the table, his wedding band catching the light.

“Yes, love. Couldn’t be better.” Arthur replied with a sweet kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to write something cute and fluffy for a change, even though it's pretty angsty at the beginning, so...I may have over did it with the ending? but oh well the boys deserve to have that^^
> 
> I had this saved in my drafts a long time now and it made a big transformation from starting out as an Omegaverse fic to some mentions of Magical Strike (but I just wanted to use that AU as a setting for Alfred and Arthur's world in which they live in)
> 
> Also, apologies for any mistakes, I'm editing this while half sleep deprived, but hopefully it was an enjoyable read :D


End file.
